Shiro Oguni is a young television producer in Tokyo who turned a mistake into a social experiment that has captured the attention of dementia practitioners throughout the world.
One day, while visiting and taking lunch at a memory care community in Osaka, he ordered a hamburger and received a plate of noodles. Rather than point out the error, as any of us might in a commercial restaurant, he stopped and thought to himself, “This is the world people with dementia live in. It’s no big deal. It’s okay to make mistakes.” So, he enjoyed his noodles and hatched an idea.
From this experience, Oguni created “The Restaurant of Mistaken Orders,” using a play on words with a popular Japanese book entitled “A Restaurant of Many Orders.” The special feature of Oguni’s restaurant is that all of the serving people are seniors with dementia! The idea is not to make fun of people with dementia for their mistakes, but to bring their condition into the light of day with support, acceptance, appreciation, and humor.
And Oguni’s idea worked; spectacularly! The Restaurant of Mistaken Orders became a sell-out success where joy and laughter abound. Customers come there expecting to be surprised, and often pitch in to assist their servers with their duties. Staff and patrons get to know each other, not through a barrier of difference, but as equals out to get to know each other, share their lives, laugh, and have a good time. Interest in the idea has caught on throughout the world, and Oguni has been overwhelmed with requests for information and guidance about how to replicate his experiment.
The Restaurant of Mistaken Orders has become a living testimony to many of the core concepts of dementia care in which I believe.
First, I believe it is not dementia that takes away one’s dignity; it is the way we treat people with dementia that takes away their dignity. And, often, we do this without even realizing it. When accepted as people who have – like all of us – special issues, we protect and restore their dignity by treating them as equals who are capable and willing to help.
Second, I believe we must focus on their abilities, rather than their disabilities, just as Shiro Oguni has done. We so often isolate people with dementia when they cannot adjust to OUR world, when in reality it is WE who have the ability to adjust to THEIR world. And why should we not, especially when it creates results that bring joy to all of us?
Third, I have observed that people with dementia are more aware of their isolation and separation than we realize they are. At every stage of cognitive decline, they sense that they are different, that they cannot do the things they used to do, and that they are set apart as troublesome and useless. While we are focusing on their physical care, we should also be focusing on their emotional and social care. We must bring them into our world and praise them for what they can do; not isolate or disdain them for what they cannot do.
I have not yet run across a Restaurant of Mistaken Orders in American, but when I do you can bet I will become one of its biggest and most grateful patrons. I will do this not because I want to be surprised by a meal I did not expect, but because we all deserve the best.
To see videos featuring this wonderful idea, go to YouTube and type in “Restaurant of Mistaken Orders.” As we always say when something nice is served up, “Enjoy!”
Debbie Selsavage is a Certified Trainer and Consultant in the Positive Approach to Care®, and a Certified Dementia Practitioner. Her company, Coping with Dementia LLC, is dedicated to making life better for individuals living with dementia. Contact Debbie at deb@coping.today to learn about free support groups on line.
Until next time remember: “We all deserve the Best”
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